Someone You'd Like To Raise A Goldfish With
by Lupin3black
Summary: To be honest, Sirius was really drunk when he slept with Remus, the IT guy where he works. But, that's not going to make him want to stop. Humor and Fluff SBRL slash NOW A ONE SHOT


Chapter One-Bacon Sandwhiches

The sun barged in through slightly opened curtains and punched Sirius Black's retina's in the metaphorical face, causing him to wake in the most unconventional way possible, he groaned as he woke, his nerves being immediately assaulted with an onslaught of pain and agony. The ebony haired man quickly closed his eyes in the hopes of getting back to sleep and avoiding the whole 'morning after' pain but it was a petty attempt as the sun was indignant at being ignored and stormed through his closed eyelids anyway.

'Bastard.' Sirius thought bitterly as his eyes peeled open for the second time this morning, he moved a little to the right and was treated to the best possible sight that could ever of happened to a man in his current state, a glass of wonderful room-temperature water and two, absolutely beautiful looking pills that he automatically recognised as paramol. The twenty-eight year old struggled upwards, hand reaching out for the glass of water and pills. He was just in the middle of realising how much his mouth tasted like a dead fish's handbag when he realised-wait, who the hell put them there?

And then he thought, 'I must've picked someone up!' And was treated to a mild moment of euphoric glee when the memories of last night hit him, he could feel the soft lips against his own and-hold on a moment, he was at the OFFICE party. Emphasis on the 'OFFICE', he works in a secondary school, there isn't many people he could take home as the place is full of old ladies and creepy men with slightly impressive moustaches-oh wait.

Remus.

Remus the IT guy.

And now he remembers it, the whispers of, "We shouldn't be doing this..." mixed with his own hushed murmurs of not caring and Remus's protests completely fled when he kissed him in the shadows of hall. "People'll see, Sirius." Remus had muttered and so Sirius, desperate for more of Remus's intoxicating kisses, took him to his flat.

Well, now he was fucked.

He looked at the ground and spotted the pain white shirt and mentally swore because hadn't Remus been wearing that last night? Oh god, he was genuinely fucked, he was fucked so much that he didn't even care about the bastarding sun anymore because Remus, he'd slept with Remus, the guy he'd been wanting to sleep with since the sandy-haired man had started at the place almost a year and a half ago once had finally retired, all smiles and nerdy tee-shirts, unconsciously making all the girls at Beabaxton's Academy for Girls, as well as Sirius, fall in love with him.

And it was made even worse by the fact that, Remus was genuinely nice person! Who Sirius wanted to take out on dates and hold his hand in the park and own a dogs with, or maybe a fish because Sirius isn't good with animals. Someone, who Sirius wanted-dare he say it-a relationship with.

Suddenly, he couldn't get his head around the idea rattling around I'm his fried skull, making the pain almost completely unbearable, so he struggled upright and bit his lip when he realised that, yeah. He was naked. He swallowed the pills with a large gulp of water and almost spat it out because-

-oh god, he smelled bacon.

Never mind a relationship, he wanted to freaking MARRY this guy! Because bacon with a hangover was like-was like-this early in the morning Sirius failed to administer a proper simile to fit such a heavenly treat like that. His mouth-now rid of the taste of the handbag belonging to a dead fish- watered at the thought of crispy brown toast slathered with butter with a heap of pink, chewy bacon resting on top covered with obscene amounts of ketch-up and: fuck, he's drooling.

Sirius gets up and pulls on last nights boxers, as well as his jeans when something black and rectangular falls from the pocket; his phone. He decides it may be a good idea to text James Potter, his best friend, as he's always helped him in his times of need, although don't tell him that.

To; Wanker (James) From; Sexy bastard

Help me dickhead! I slept with Remus, the IT guy!

Sun 11:59 AM

To; Tosser (Sirius) From; Stunning

Fuck off, I'm tired.

Sun 12:03 PM

"Thanks for your words of wisdom, you utter twat." Sirius mumbles at his phone before squaring his shoulders and heading to the kitchen of his flat, following the smell of glorious bacon with his nose, where he's greeted to the most beautiful sight he has ever been greeted to first thing in the morning.

Remus John Lupin, the IT guy, is wearing not only his boxers, but a white tee-shirt belonging to Sirius that it drips off one of his shoulders and exposes a collar bone, decorated in hickies that Sirius can see when the younger man spins around and gives him a sheepish smile, blushing when he notices that Sirius is slightly-kinda-maybe-shirtless. "Morning Sirius! I hope you don't mind, but I made bacon sandwiches. Do you want one?" And his smile is so beautiful and genuine that Sirius can only nod as he lowered himself into one of the chairs at his table.

"Yeah-uh-yeah, that'd be nice." Sirius croaks and Remus grins at him before spinning around to the stove again, the ebony-haired man is glad that he sat down because he knows his knees would have buckled. The silence behind them is comfortable which Sirius is grateful for because when he usually has a one-night stand stay behind he usually has to ask them to leave, very awkwardly so.

But of course, he doesn't really want Remus to be a one-night stand.

(Pagebreak)

They eat breakfast-or is it lunch by now?- slowly, laughing at something each other has said through mouthfuls of beautiful, glorious greasy bacon tang makes Sirius want to cry as his headache magically disappears and he feels a little more human now. It feels as if they've been daring for years and have slipped into a wonderfully easy routine.

Sirius wants that to be permanent.

When Remus finally disappears into Sirius's bedroom to get dressed, Sirius remains at the table, attempting to work up the courage to ask for Remus's number, a date if he's bold enough. Because he wants something like this, something a bit more real than he usually has and to be honest he's fancied Remus for a whole now, and even though James would tease him for a while for dating a nerd (because Remus had a whole range of superhero tee-shirts and reads comics during his tea-breaks and it's not creepy at all that he knows that) it'd be nice to have someone to come home too and have someone to text if he's running late-

And, and there's Remus now. Grinning at him shyly as he holds a yellow post-it with his number scrawled across it, leaving him with his heart beating painfully fast and oh god. This man's wonderful.

**A/N**

**I shouldn't be starting anything new, but I wanted to do something funny and cute where they start dating without having to do the whole build-up towards it. **

**Please R-E-V-I-E-W!**

**-lupin3black **


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